Boil Water Before Consumption Notice

                          

The other night, about 10:30 PM, My youngest daughter Shaye came over to the house and as soon as she walked in she asked if we had gotten the notice from the City Of Burleson earlier in the day about the Boil Water Before Consumption Notice. We had not heard a thing about it and I had been consuming the heck out of the water all day.  Someone had broken a twelve inch water main around two PM that afternoon and it was not repaired until ten-thirty that night at which time a sample was sent in for testing that would take twenty-four hours to obtain results.

Well, I became pretty excited and concerned about the situation, more so than Amber and other family members, possibly because I may have been under the influence of a couple of snifters of brandy. My normally not so active brain went to work. I remember thinking in all the movies when there was a wound or a danger of germs or bacteria, they would pour an alcoholic beverage over the affected area and then guzzle down the remainder and it nearly always worked. So, the affected area was my insides, therefore that's where the alcohol needed to be. I immediately began downing snifter after snifter of brandy and after Amber turned down several of my offers to partake of the elixir, I finished off the bottle.

Then, with my brain still in full gear, I began jumping up and down and rolling back and forth on the floor to make sure the brandy was thoroughly mixed into all the important parts of my body. Well, my plan  worked, the rest of the night went by real fast and the best I recall, I fell asleep pretty quick and sometime during the night got up and went to bed. I woke up the next day, about lunch, and it was obvious my plan had worked, I was still alive. Of course Amber and everybody else was still kicking although they didn't seem to be suffering from a killer headache and a   nauseating reaction to the smell of food like I was. I'm sure it was a reaction to some of the bacteria I consumed the day before, just think how bad it could have been had I not self medicated.